the template

he whispered slowly to my ear, "i love you, grace"

i pretended not to hear anything, as i asked, "ano yon?"

then he said it again, "sabi ko, i love you..."

i didn't react. i just stared blankly into space, thinking, what is he talking about?
if only he was someone else -- someone else i'm expecting, i wouldn't have any other second thoughts and would have just responded.

he followed, "buong araw ka na tahimik, anu bang iniisip mo?"

i couldn't speak, i'm thinking of another person doing that same thing. he held my hand so tight as if he was not willing to let it go. i put away my hand. i don't know, but i'm certain of one thing, i am not into him.

you would know it once i am sooo into a guy. this time, i just want to give him a lesson. a lesson he wouldn't forget.

i am from a broken family. i know this guy who pretends and acts like a single has a child and a wife. i'm just thinking, why on earth would he do something like that to his wife? i just couldn't bear seeing him sickeningly mushy over me.

i picture myself having a family, my spouse goes home past the time he usually goes home. i would demand an explanation. then he would just say, "OT ma e..." then i would smell smoke and alcohol. when he took off his shirt its smell reminded me of a woman's perfume, but definitely not the kind that i would buy. then his child would come to him, and ask "daddy, where have you been?" he'll just flash a devilish smile that would give me a hint that he is cheating. i am sooo afraid that that might happen to me. i don't want to. i don't want to be cheated.

that's why i'm wondering how come that that bastard never thought twice upon making his decisions. on the other hand, i should have asked him, but i'd rather not. i know he wouldn't answer. he accepted me very well, spent his money and time with me as if his child wouldn't need any. i act foolishly when they talked about their lovelife the just this morning. i don't want him to know that i know something.

he again whispered, "wag na tayong pumasok?"

followed with a phrase, "hindi, wag na tayong umuwi?"

i know what he is up to so i asked, "san tayo pupunta?"then he flashed that smile again.

he says i love you undoubtedly. as if he knows everything about me, he doesn't even know when my birthday is or my background. he just know certain facts about me but he doesn't know me. one thing is sure, i wouldn't like to know him either. i know him based from the things he did. i don't want to be his. that's why this whole game should finish soon.

maybe he thinks he can fool me, if only he knows that i have mastered the game years back.

"uwi na 'ko ha, ingat ka mamaya."
"pahinga ka pag-uwi mo"
"bukas nalang kita antayin"

ah! enough of this BIG mess.